Week 6: Numbers Don’t Lie
Fourteen years! Fourteen years in the JNIC Fantasy Football League. Each one of us has put forth our best efforts each go round to fight to the finish and hold up the crown! And yet, each year, there’s only one winner. Thirteen champions have been crowned in our league. But with mostly everyone in the league having at least one championship, the conversation around “The Pyramid” continues to rear it’s lovely head each season as new narratives get thrown in the mix. Who’s at the top? Who deserves to be there? And, of course, who is stuck down in those second and third tiers — forever fighting for respect but not quite there just yet. It's the kind of debate that no one wins, yet we love it nevertheless. It’s like arguing about Howard vs Hampton: arguments can be made for either side; and while there’s no definitive answer, it’s always fun watching people get worked up about it. And I’ll be honest, I’ve leaned all the way in. I live for this banter! You know me - I’m the guy who will fight to the death to make my case for being at the top (you’ve got to admit, whether you agree with me or not, “The Most Decorated” is a great narrative!) So, in the spirit of keeping this never-ending discussion alive, I’ve decided to throw a new wrinkle into the mix. Buckle up, because I’m bringing in new receipts. Gentlemen, I present to you all-time head-to-head matchups. Yeah, we’re going there now. It’s just another completely objective data point to stir the pot. You're welcome.
As you review the records above, note that each owner’s personal records against each competitor are showcased in the vertical column. (e.g., my record against Dunc is 4-4; against Dre, it’s 9-7, etc.) You’ll find your respective records in each vertical column under your name. Additionally, these records are from the beginning of the JNIC FFL through the 2023 season. It does not include the five weeks of this season. I’ll continue to adjust the record books at the end of each season. You can find the All-Time Stats and Records in the “About” section of our site. Also, take note that these are regular-season records only. They do not include playoff matchups (although I’ll touch on some data points from the postseason shortly.) Lastly, you’ll probably recognize that some of us played each other more times than others. There are a couple of reasons for that: 1) the randomized schedule each year dictates that some of us will have 2 or 3 matchups twice against another owner each year. Interestingly enough, Lance and Sherv have matched up twice against each other 18 times because of this. That’s the most in JNIC history thus far. 2) Malik and Elijah were once in the league and I did not take those matchups into consideration when creating this spreadsheet. 3) Lance and Dunc joined the league a bit later obviously and so they have fewer matchups.
So feel free to review the numbers. I’m sure a lot of conversation will come from this. But in true commish fashion: I’d like to point out a few things that caught my attention when aggregating these results. (this shit took me hours btw, smh.)
-
Yours truly, The Most Decorated, with 13 wins against Sherva.
-
Mel with one win. all-time against Dunc.
-
Dunc with 9 winning records against opponents. Now some may want to offer an asterisk to this feat, as Dunc has only been in the league for a total of 6 full seasons, compared to the rest of us, with 12 and 14 seasons. That is a reasonable argument to be made, but it’s still a feat worth recognizing.
-
Stephen A. Haynes, with 8 losing records against opponents.
-
This is actually a tie between Tone and Kenny, each with 3 double-digit win totals against opponents.
It is important to put these numbers in the proper context: these are regular-season numbers only. And frankly, the regular season is just that - regular. The postseason is where legends are made. The gods will remember us for our championships and medals. Future generations will sing songs of the champions. The maesters will scribe in the annals the stories of postseason runs and championship glory, not of week 5 upsets. And to that point, let us look back at some of the championship battles of yesteryear to call to remembrance some of the great wars of years past:
The Narrowest Path to the Throne:
(closest margin of victory in JNIC Championship History)
(2012) Zach - 113.06 vs Mel - 111.38
It came down to the wire, but it didn’t have to. With one of the most aggravating performances in fantasy football history, Mel’s Hakeem Nicks scored 0 points on 3 targets and 0 receptions for the first time in the season. Nicks averaged 4.4 receptions and 58 yards per game that season heading into the finale. Just one catch for 15 yards would’ve put Mel over the hump, but because of his beloved NY Giants receiver, he lost by the closest margin in JNIC Championship history: 1.68 points!
Annihilation on the Gridiron
(the largest margin of victory in JNIC Championship History):
(2023) Dre - 150.36 vs Dunc - 101.68
A blowout before it even started, Dre secured the largest championship blowout in our league’s history last year with a 48.68-point margin of victory. Led by CeeDee Lamb and Josh Allen, and with surprising performances by Khalil Herbert and Chris Godwin, Dre’s team was no match for Dunc’s on that given Sunday. Dunc put up a valiant effort, but there was nothing he could do to match the prowess of Dre’s team. It’s a performance that will last the tales of time.
The David vs. Goliath Game
(biggest upset in JNIC Championship History)
(2021) CJ - 133.16 vs Zach - 110.38
I remember that Saturday before the matchup. Claude called me to request a split. He felt the loss coming himself. Yahoo predicted a 130.29 - 109.85 victory by yours truly. Cooper Kupp was putting up ungodly numbers all season. Justin Herbert was showing flashes of becoming a formidable rival to Pat Mahomes. And Austin Ekeler finished as the #2 RB in the season. I could not be stopped. I knew it. My opponent knew it. It was just a matter of time. I planned out how I would spend my winnings. I had the perfect vacation planned to St. Lucia… But “Any Given Sunday” showed its ass that day, as Claude strutted out Trey Friggin Lance as his starting QB that afternoon, who scored 20+ points; Rashaad Penny, who, outside of one good game the week prior, averaged about 2 points per game that season, yet somehow scored 31 points in the championship game; and a Chicago defense that gave their best performance of the season with a whopping 21 points in the season finale. I still cannot believe I lost that game smh.
I need a strong drink … I’ll see you guys on Sunday.
